The feeling of being alone....

The feeling of being alone... Ahhh nobody really likes this feeling, but I seem to have it alot! I can be in a crowded place and still feel like there is no one around! How is this possible? What can make a person feel so alone? I know that it goes with how I make myself feel. I can control how I feel, but how? How can I help from feeling alone? It seems like here lately my boys are the only ones that make me feel better. I know that I have friends and family, but some just tell you want you want to hear. My boys are so honest with me.  I really can not imagine my life without them, I truly believe they were given to me, to help me! Who knows where I would be right now if I didnt have them! Ok, so a little of topic I went, but hey, thats me!
So how can I help myself from feeling alone.. That is such a great question. I know that i should prolly interact more with people when I am around them, that would help. I should make my own self worth increase.. but then again I cant do that overnight. It takes time. This is something that I am getting better at, but it stil sneaks up on me! I teach new hire, and I can still manage to feel alone while in class with them. Some of that I believe, is because I let myself feel "not worthy" and chose not to participate due to, I dont want to make myself look or feel stupid, so the first reaction to that is to back away. So this truly is one of the things that I want to work on.

Intimidation

So today I would like to talk about intimidation. What inside of us lets someone else intimidate us? Our prior experiences? Our self-worth?
I think that a lot of things can contribute to this feeling. In recent experience why would I let someone with a college degree intimidate me? I am the teacher, I AM the one that knows the job at hand, not them. They are the new hires. So why on this green earth am I bothered by this. I am letting myself think that they are better then me, when in fact no one is better then anyone else. And you know what? I may not be able to control them, but I can control how I feel about them and my attitude towards them, and how I let them make me feel. I AND I ALONE, can choose to not let their behaviors and past intimidate me!  I am the only one that can control how I feel. The sooner that this is realized. The sooner that I can truly enjoy everyday things that I have missed before!
until next time! 

About me!

I would like to start out by just saying that I am not an English major or specialize in grammar, so there may be some mistakes. LOL I am mainly doing this to chat about my everyday challenges and triumphs. I will start out my saying a few things about myself that may help decipher things later...lol I just turned 30 this year, I am a mother of 2 wonderful boys, They are my life. I have been married for 6 years and this at times is challenging. I have a beagle named Tinker.
I am a New hire Trainer and I love what I do, but at times can be very challenging and stressful. I love to teach New Hires and I am in the middle of my second class, and I am quickly learning that all classes are not the same.
My parents have been divorced since I was in 1st grade, My mother re-married and my dad remarried the same month and year that I did.
i lost my me-ma last year and I miss her so much! She was my absolutely best friend. My voice of reason, and I am lost without her. (more will come on her later)
This is a brief back ground about me.